2/10/09

OOOOOOOOOK i have been told some people are craving some updates.  just know–the longer i am quiet that means everything is relatively quiet on our front as well…which is never unwelcome.  (nothing like a double negative to make a positive–isn’t that an ironic life philosophy?)  anyhow, some news!  i had asked for another chance at speech therapy the first week of january and the doctor said not yet.  but we did start trying to give mike his cans of food just 3 times a day through his feeding tube instead of all day long on a slow feed with a feeding pump.  this was to help him/ his belly adjust to the idea of meals again.  also it was to try to get him to eat more at a meal time instead of tiny amounts in a random snacking way.  we have ditched the feeding pump but he still gets tired/coughing after eating small amounts.  so we have not made much headway in the strength of his swallowing though his stomach has been fine with meal sized amounts being poured straight into his belly at once..

but, for some reason not readily obvious to me the doctor wrote an order for speech/swallow therapy starting now despite saying no last month.  so we are set up for a month of speech/swallow therapy monday/wednesday/fridays for the next month.  upon being evaluated today she said that mike had kept his tongue strength but regressed in his breathing strength.  he simply needs to breathe deeper and talk louder which will also help his swallowing which will then pave the way for passing the next level on a swallow test.  honestly, i found it a frustrating reality to have the pro say what i feel like i nag about constantly…  for example, “mike, you HAVE to talk louder.  take a deep breath.  no, i don’t care that it is hard to do.  do it anyway.  don’t waste effort telling me how hard it is.  do it right.”  obviously i am not great company.  i don’t even like to listen to me.  in fact i hate being the person nagging about it every day.  but i did feel irritable watching the therapist listen to his weak voice.  i felt like he was not even showing her his capabilities.  so i nagged him in front of her and he did get louder.

so…  i am excited about his therapy because i do hope it will be a shot in the arm for him in terms of motivation and confirmation again that there is no substitute for him doing the work.  i struggle because i would even say that prayer is no substitute for mike doing the work and i worry that mike relies on prayer almost at the expense of setting a goal and aiming for it himself.  i guess i would ask for prayer that God would certainly be at work still in repairing and transforming mike for His glory and that mike would be working just as hard toward that goal himself.  i pray specifically for a stronger voice that would coax him further in engaging in social settings where he feels handicapped.  i pray for an easier and smoother road in swallowing practice and food.  and mike would undoubtedly specifically ask for prayer for an immediate total recovery from God.  so thank you for your patience and faithfulness in looking for updates with us and pray away!  love, michelle and co.